NHJ's account of Brooklyn public schooling and the corresponding @mattyglesias DC piece share a theme: participation in the system by high-SES parents who may (or may not) be able to improve public schools. Another commonality: both frankly address the use of private tutoring.
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One point: high-SES parent participation and private tutoring are both instances of people *outside the school's payroll* accomplishing valid school objectives. This raises a question of why the school doesn't accomplish these valid objectives on its own.
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"What can high-SES parents accomplish?" is a good question, a NHJ theme, and relevant to a commonly-deployed argument that people like me (or Yglesias or NHJ) should stay in the system because their resources can improve things.
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Both parent accounts I mention identify academic deficiencies at their school; NHJ thinks her school's deficiencies are very broad, while Yglesias has a more narrow critique of his school (lack of options for kids on fast learning tracks).
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But in the end, neither parent really addresses those academic deficiencies *through the school.* NHJ attempts to review academics in fourth grade are stonewalled. She hires a tutor that year. Matt Y's text skips to the tutoring solution more directly.

Sep 24, 2026 · 8:56 PM UTC

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We should note the Yglesiases volunteer at the school--Matt credits mostly his wife--but for social events and extracurriculars, not building the math and reading programs for other people's kids. This of course makes sense; they're volunteers, it's not their job.
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In these accounts it looks like engaged parents can help broader school life, but they can't really control the core reading and math functions, and that's why they implement their own parallel at-home schooling instead.
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If you're thinking in Hirschman exit vs voice terms, and saying parents should use voice instead of exit, the parallel at-home schooling looks quite a bit like a stealth exit on the core academic functions anyway. The "exit-shaming" seems misplaced.
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