Soldier. Cardinal tactician. Colt. Simple man.

Stanford
Dearest mother — We have returned to our basecamp after a long march following a defeat to the sad Satan unit. Perhaps their victory will finally give them some much-needed joy. And yet, we have no time to wallow. A Georgia unit who believes themselves to be wasps is seeking battle and on the move. I have ordered the men to make buzzing sounds as they drill to better prepare for the incoming clash. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — We have reached the outskirts of the Sad Satan unit’s camp. I have ordered the men to be issued pitchforks to be better matched in battle with these Beelzebubs. Anxious. I love you. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — We continue our march to the Sad Satan unit, who scouts report believe themselves to be royalty. Confounding. I have ordered the men to drill while reminiscing about a doleful memory to better understand our opponent. I have received your care package spiced duck necks and sweet skunk snouts. — Andrew
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Capt. Andrew Luck retweeted
The @CaptAndrewLuck Twitter account is famous. Real Andrew Luck provided his voice to set the stage for @StanfordFball's battle last night on @ESPN. He also spent about 10 minutes getting into character and making edits to the script.
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Dearest mother — No doubt news has reached the farm that our unit was defeated by the weather men. Their Canes were simply too mighty — but there is no time to be downcast. A unit of Sad Demons hailing from North Carolina seeks battle. We are on the march. Hopeful. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — We shall battle tonight, under the stars. The My-ami weather unit with their Canes has nearly reached our position. Scouts report a duck as tall as a man has been spotted wandering the outset of town. Possibly a spy. Perplexing… but nevertheless, we are ready. Our resolve is strong. I love you. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — Scouts repot the storm unit nears. Our men are drilling twice as hard whenever there is a gust of wind to make ready for this element battle. I have received your care package of spiced turkey necks and dried rabbit knees. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — Scouts report a unit out of My-ami seeks battle and is on the march. I am told these men believe themselves to be a mighty weather storm and carry Canes. Fascinating. I have ordered the men to spin in circles as they drill with water being splashed upon them in order to prepare. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — The men achieved a hard fought victory. The Ha-waii unit was formidable, but our resolve was strong. As they clap their coconuts together on the long journey back, I have given my men permission to engage in well-earned frivolities. Victory suits us. How I cherish the sensation. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — The Ha-waii unit nears. I have ordered our men to drill among pigs with apples in their mouth. Reconnaissance shows this may be useful once battle commences. I have received your care package of salted sparrow knees and jellied opossum cakes. We are ready. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — The time has arrived — battle shall be at hand. Scouts report the unit out of the Hi-waii land is sailing our way. I am told they wear grass pants as camouflage. So I have ordered grass clippings to be a fixed to the men’s uniforms. Our resolve is strong. The first clash is near. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — Basic training is underway. A new campaign is upon us. I am enraptured. The men look strong and determined. Time away from the battlefield has done me well — and allowed my mind and neck beard to grow closer. Please send squirrel oil and your scrumptious salted pork ankles. I feel plucky about what lie ahead. — Andrew
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Dearest mother — I am sure news has reached you about our loss to the angered Leprechaun unit. Thus, this campaign is complete. I am filled with pride. The men fought hard for months on end, and I am sure the unit’s success will grow exponentially in campaigns to come. As for me, I returned to the battlefield - and it was glorious. It’s truly where I belong. That said: tell the hogs, chickens and cows I shall be there for Christmas, so they best start decorating the house and start practicing their carols. I love you. See you soon. — Andrew
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Capt. Andrew Luck retweeted
General Luck Bobbleheads secured ✅ #GoStanford
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Capt. Andrew Luck retweeted
Secured the bobble 🤓🌲👨‍✈️@CaptAndrewLuck @StanfordFball @GoStanford
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Dearest mother — The men are resting for the enormous battle that awaits with the ill-tempered leprechauns. The unit drilled on their knees most of today to be ready for their possible short statures. Your care package of sweetened wolf ribs and owl neck pie was most wonderful. The unit is ready. Battle calls. We shall answer. — Andrew
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Capt. Andrew Luck retweeted
Bobbleception. 🎟️ gostanford.com/LuckBobblehea…
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Dearest mother — Our campaign has nearly come to a close. One final battle remains. Scouts report a group of combative Leprechauns out of Notre Dame march this way. Astonishing. We shall drill extensively — and twice as hard when a rainbow appears. They may be cantankerous, and possibly magical… but we are steadfast in our resolve. — Andrew
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