I paint stuff and shitpost. God has a sense of humor, and so should you.

EST, United States
Some people have been asking about my story, so here you go: I am a sinner, saved by Grace through Faith, not by works. I've been a cook and chef almost my entire adult life started washing dishes at 16 in a little mom and pop seafood restaurant. I've worked McDonalds. I've worked mom and pop. I've worked buffets. I worked a Michelin star restaurant that served $1000 a plate dinners for state congressmen. I've been an alcoholic since I was 14. Made it 5 years sober and relapsed hard. 8 years clean and counting this time. In 2018 I broke my back at work. Two ruptured discs and two fractured bones, L3 and L4. Surgery was not because an excellent and brutally honest doctor explained that it was simply too high of a risk of causing more damage. He wasn't going to put a 30 year old in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. Between that and the great enstupiding of 2020, life has been hard. I have chronic pain. I retired from restaurants in 2022, unable to stand on concrete floors due to sciatic pain. I work as a tax preparer's assistant. I'm in school to be an accountant. I like my job, keeping people from giving the government more of their money is a small way to give back. I'm stubborn, cranky, mostly run on coffee and spite. I paint miniatures for myself and for commission, and I've started writing, both adventure fantasy and spicier stuff. Just looking for friends, and hoping for a better tomorrow. If you're looking for an honest man who will do what he can, I'm your guy. Remember, folks. In the words of @HLC_actual : Don't do the enemy any favors. Don't quit, that just makes the pain someone else's burden.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
As a pilot for 20 years I have questions: - where are the cabin crew here? - where are the oxygen masks that automatically drop during a rapid emergency descent? - how did the Capt manage to open the door while being stabbed? - Omani pilots were not allowed to fly to Israel, why was he allowed? - how did the offending pilot get a weapon onboard? - why has this happened so close to elections? - how are passengers walking around while apparently in a nosedive? - who else was injured? Nose dives cause significant g force incidents - why is there two perfectly positioned people recording the incident and not helping? - why did a plumber take control and not the 2 pilots onboard who would certainly know when an aircraft was in a nosedive? - why was the plumber speaking in English to Bibi after the flight - why was he still in his blood soaked clothes 8 hours after the incident False Flags have been a very effective mechanism to influence public opinion Hitler burnt down the Reichstag just before his parliament elections and he won the election…changing the course of history. A full and independent investigation should be carried out here. Hopefully independent journalist will be allowed to view this too.
#WATCH: Israeli passengers rush the cockpit to rescue their Flydubai flight after the copilot attempted to hijack it.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
The violence in France will happen in Britain because nobody has the balls to acknowledge the truth that we are already at war and do what’s needed. Shoot the rioters dead. Ignore the judges, tear up all ‘human rights’ legislation and treaties, and start mass deportations at gunpoint back to their native shitholes, whether they were born here or not. If any country refuses to take them, put them in concentration camps on bread and water until they choose to leave. Cancel all foreign aid and all visas from those countries forever, and confiscate all their assets. This is the moderate position.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
Silicon from sand qualifies. If the people stay quiet, these circuits will still testify. Luke 19:40 holds.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
‘Tiny Hats’ [The Joey Goode Show] !! with captions - DOWNLOADABLE. 🐷
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It is time we were understood 🗣️
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Okay, @TheBaronofBold, you got me. Kallie may be a girl more interested in taking clothes off, rather than dressing up, but she does love her some Oktoberfest. All the beer she can chug, and she can chug a lot! For her, every season is spooky season! @EveandFriends88 @allthings_femme @Aiblissnlust @Rudeistheword
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And a bonus set, Kallie and Cassie might compete for tips at the club, but they can set aside their rivalry for a few drinks.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
Replying to @BaT_MaN_23
Done.
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I'm going to share my thoughts and then link to this post after this. I think the "Cornell 7" case is one of two likely scenarios: 1. The fact that she's "Jane Doe" and they're talking about a 50-person group chat (and that two were apparently expelled) tells me that everybody involved in this story is named some variation of Sukshit Derpjeet. And Derpjeeta is looking for a payout to reclaim her family's izzat. Because those are the only "men" I can think of that would be down for sloppy sevenths, and we know they use those group chats for cheating. I don't think I know 50 people, much less that many I could put in a single group and not have to moderate a bar brawl. 2. Everybody involved is named some variation of Dashawn or Jamarquavious, and Deshawnda is looking for a payout. What do I think will happen? They'll find her one single white male classmate who somehow managed to slip through the admission process and plaster his face on the news because it's an election season. More likely, one of the two scenarios is the case, and this vanishes in a week.
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It's important for people who are married and who love their wives not to flaunt their perfect situation to those who have been betrayed by the previous generation which generated mainly wh0res and psychotic ugly women. It's a very rare thing, and you have myopia if you don't understand this. Just because you got lucky doesn't mean the majority of men have the same chance as you. It doesn't give you a platform to philosophise. You've got a wife, good for you, it was a very normal and easy thing to obtain 150 years ago. Today, allowing the average (or even well above average) woman into your life is the end of your life for most men. There are exceptions to every rule and you happen to be one. Don't smear it on the faces of those who never had the chance to meet someone decent while remaining decent themselves the entire time. It will just make them ignore everything else you have to say.
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The question that nobody is asking yet. How many of the "57" have Star Wars names?
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
We have Comanche braves offering to scalp our enemies on live TV.

ALT What Year Is It GIF

I am officially making the offer of my services to any cucked Western nation to act as your crime deterrent. If migrants are raping/abusing your kids, I will scalp them in full Comanche ceremonal garb on live television. I'll be the bad guy. Crime guaranteed to plummet.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
GM X Fam! We are halfway through the week!
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The Power of Concealment I currently live in a small country town in Australia. As in any rural area, police response times are garbage, so you need to be self-sufficient. But what if your government has made it hard for you to legally own firearms? My neighbor is an Aussie farmer with three kids. We’re close with them, so they come over all the time riding their BMXs on an improvised track I scraped out for them. I would never use an actual pic of them online, so forgive the AI. @Natalie_Anaru loves them; she bakes them their weight in muffins and gets clucky whenever they’re around. Their father is a good guy. Like a REALLY good guy. He’s one of those country boys who will do anything for anyone, and as a result, I suspect people take advantage of him. He’s a professional hunter, so he has firearms, but he’s away from home for days at a time on jobs. He knows that he can rely on me if anything happens while he’s away, but I need to travel for work myself. The danger in rural Australia isn’t gangs; it’s random (thankfully very rare) mass shootings, normally by an estranged family member. My neighbor has a few family members in town who he’s on really poor terms with, and I’ve known for a while it’s an issue for him. We were discussing it during a particularly productive beer conference on my porch a few weeks ago when I came up with a cunning plan. At dusk, I got the kids to come over wearing whatever ragtag camo gear they had (not much at that stage) and proceeded to take them through the basics of concealment. The youngest boy and the girl were nervous about the dark, but after I took them out and sat down with them and their eyes began to adjust, I explained that the dark is your friend. It will hide you from any bad people who might want to find you. Keeping the language really basic, I explained how to use natural foliage, dust (when it’s dry) and mud (when it’s not), rocks, shrubs, and the natural rise and fall of the terrain to break up their silhouettes and match the surrounding natural texture. So they had one minute to hide out of my line of sight, then I’d hunt them. The first attempts were hilarious but encouraging… they definitely had some of their dad’s genetic memory. But the cackling and the shouting had to go, so the next afternoon, covered in sweat from riding all morning and eating Nat’s brownies, we moved on to light and noise discipline. We started with (VERY basic) hand gestures. Halt, freeze, danger, double-time… you know, just the applicable stuff. They’re young. Practicing that produced a lot of gibberish and giggling. Which is good. We like morale. They learned not to carry anything that makes a noise when moving, and to move slowly (mind where your feet go; sweep twigs and small branches aside with your toe) unless you’re in an open area with no concealment and/or there’s no other option. If someone sees you and gives chase, run, use slip tricks (I showed them a couple), and keep going until the line of sight has been broken for at least a full minute, then drop and conceal. If it’s daylight, reflective things go in your pockets. They also learned how to safely cross obstacles (like barbed-wire fences, which are everywhere around here) and leave minimal physical traces of passage through an area where there’s no ground cover. Day three, I’m changing my wiper fluid and guess how many of the town kids turn up. I’ve gone from a fire team to a platoon. I knew all their parents, so it’s not like I could say no. So the Junior Q Course started all over again. That was about a month ago when it was still fairly cold. Now it’s warming up, and I’ll walk out to my barn and routinely find two or three of the older kids (early teens) using my gym equipment, and “camouflage” is apparently the hottest game in town. They’ve nagged their parents to buy them Multicams (the Aussie version, which is better for this terrain), and some of them look like miniature operators. They’re crazy good at concealment now, and it’s only been a short time. There’s no more laughing, no chatter, no breaking noise discipline. One ten-year-old from a particularly poor home (housing commission, they call it here) shows real imagination and promise. When he arrived at my place on his mountain bike, he leaned it up against a wall near a tarp that I had left on the ground. I gave them their minute, and in that time he pushed the bike aside, laid the tarp out, pulled the bike back into place, wriggled between it and the wall, and covered himself with the tarp overlap. Perfect pattern breakup, and I eventually needed to concede. I couldn’t find him. I didn’t tell him to do that; he came up with it himself. It occurred to me today that this is something simple that we all can and should be doing for our kids and/or other kids in the community, provided their parents are okay with it. I now know that if needed, a ton of kids in town will make it extremely hard for any would-be abductor to grab them, and that’s a source of real satisfaction for me. We don’t know what the future will hold, and this is something that kids can learn quickly and get good at rapidly.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
I'm tired of people trying to sound philosophical all the time. America is actually a place, and you need to get the fuck out of it.
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My husband, @mattvanswol has been locked out of his X account for refusing to delete a post he made this morning. X locked his account for “abuse and harassment” which of course, he did not do. In fact, he did the EXACT OPPOSITE and stated how horrible the video was and how awful it was to watch. How can we “be the news” if we cannot post the news without being forced to delete it? This is wrong. People should be allowed to see the content Matt posts, regardless of whether it is hard to watch or not. Personally, I often find it really difficult to watch some of the content Matt posts because it is so horrible. And that’s exactly the point. People need to KNOW things like this are happening… because without people like Matt, so many stories would not be national news and catalysts for change. @x and @elonmusk please fix this.
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TheCrankyPainter retweeted
“Sit the election out. Punish the republicans.” Absolutely not. This is what happens when you do that.
The Governor of New Mexico has just declared the 1st & 2nd Amendment “does not exist” due to an “emergency.” Under this legal theory *all* of our “rights” are essentially eliminated. Watch the most evil & tyrannical 60 seconds you’ve ever heard from a politician:
Community note
This is from 2023, not new. NM's emergency firearm-carry order expired Oct 2024 and was not renewed. A judge blocked the original ban in days forcing the governor to amend. No version remains in effect. governor.state.nm.us/newsroom/relea…
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❗️ Those advocating a blockade or strike on Kaliningrad should have no illusions about the consequences. Any British or NATO military action against Russian territory would be met with all means at Russia’s disposal, including nuclear weapons. t.me/RusEmbUK/3954
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Very real. Count your blessings.
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