If left to his own devices, be aware that the patient may attempt to talk to God.
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
daisy buchanan: aw fuck i accidentally killed my husband’s mistress. Well it’s a good thing that the only witness was the man who’s been all-consumingly obsessed with me for both of our adult lives
doctor t.j. eckleburg:
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
Hey, Stephen A. Smith:
Lane Johnson's mom has cancer. His dad is also sick. I read your book and you talked about how difficult your life got when your mom got sick and after she passed, you had to go to therapy because you were depressed and you took time off of work.
Your mocking Lane Johnson's mental health struggles when you've been open about your own mental health struggles?
Come on, man. I know you're busy, but do some research before going on TV @stephenasmith
#Eagles
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
this is why they failed to force people to take charlie kirk’s death seriously btw. they fundamentally do not value life and are shocked when that is reciprocated. just unserious people
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
This is not consequence free, those taxes were going towards the upkeep of the highway systems, specifically from the class of vehicles that cause the most damage, now everyone else is going to have to pay more in order to keep highway maintenance funded at the same level
🚨 BREAKING: By stroke of pen, President Trump just signed an executive order on stage brought to him by Natalie Harp to greenlight virtually TAX FREE DIESEL FUEL for truckers, farmers and other Americans
The Nebraska crowd just ERUPTED! 🔥
Typical trucker saves $100 per fill-up, farmers will save MILLIONS
"I'm gonna do what Biden couldn't do. Sign the signature!"
THE MAGIC OF TRUMP RALLIES 🇺🇸
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
Fully understand why people would hate this but man. This is the Lindelof shit I’ve been needing since episode one. I really, really love it when finales are all about the characters closure instead of a bombastic climax. Kyle Chandler we will miss you forever.
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
Lmao he had to make up a fake reason to prove he could lift a child
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
I was on the right side of history saying Will should've closed his fist
Chris Rock says he had the money to pay for a lawyer for his friend's wrongly convicted brother and he didn't
"white people believe every accusation is a conviction. A guy named Roger Logan who I grew up with who he was one of my best friends brothers went to jail for 19 years for a murder he didn't commit"
"His brother used to plead with me to pay for a lawyer for Roger and I never did it...I always had like a no lawyer thing because a lawyer is like an open-ended thing. Like I'll pay your mortgage. I'll put whatever"
"I always stay out of lawyers because it's so open-ended and it still messes with me. I had the means to help him and I didn't. I don't know if we could have got him out or not"
"so all that to say is I'm black. Black men get accused of things they didn't do all the time"
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
The line to piss on his grave will stretch for 1,000 miles
Reporter: "What do you say to those who are struggling to afford gas, groceries, diesel?"
Trump: You're losers. It's the greatest. If you're struggling in this economy, you're a loser.
There's your midterm messaging from the GOP
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🚨 LSU football player Damien Shanklin under investigation for alleged rape. tmz.com/2026/10/02/damien-sh…
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
genuinely so deeply funny and pathetic that republicans spent decades scaremongering that democrats “buy peoples votes with handouts” to now just genuinely trying to fool and buy peoples votes with direct handouts
If Republicans win the House of Representatives and the Senate in the 2026 Midterm Elections, I’m going to give all adult citizens in the United States of America, $5,000! Thank you for your attention to this matter, and I look forward to signing those checks!
Community note
This $5,000 “Trump Dividend” promise was first made in Sept. 2026. Similar prior DOGE and tariff check pledges have not been paid out. It would cost ~$1.2 trillion and require congressional approval.
pbs.org/newshour/polit…
washingtonpost.com/politics/2026/…
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
there are vanishingly few principles that Donald Trump holds to, but by far the most important one is a universal admiration and fellowship with sex criminals
Trump defends the men in the Cornell gang rape case, saying he “feels bad” for them and they won't get a “fair shake”
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
her referring to the rapists as "boys" and calling the victim a "woman"
bbreact reaction videos
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
Please understand that they haze their pledges in order to find out who is the most loyal and trustworthy.
That's why you had a group chat of 57 men at Cornell and none of them said anything.
Arizona university ex-fraternity leader gets jail time after pledge died of alcohol poisoning trib.al/X3VEJoR
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
In the 1997 film “Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery” Austin, a sex obsessed ladies man, spends the entire film trying and failing to seduce his work partner. When she finally wants to fuck him, he declines because she is drunk.
How do you get beat by Austin Powers?
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
rape an unconcious woman behind a dumpster? you have a bright future.
gang rape a woman with your teammates? you'll still get drafted to the NHL.
drug & rape a student with your frat bros? just write an essay.
say 'free palestine'? expelled & charged with acts of terrorism.
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
TRUMP: I'VE DONE A SHITTY JOB AS PRESIDENT.
Community note
Trump’s full remark was conditional: “If it is the biggest thing I’ve ever done, I’ve done a sh*tty job as president.” He was responding to a suggestion that the new America.gov website might be his biggest government accomplishment. mediaite.com/politics/trump…
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
Current registry photo. Dayton Ohio. Stay on their necks forever.
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D.C. Crowder retweeted
NO SANTA IN ISRAEL, PAL.
“The Situation Room connected the call. Biden jumped in. “Bibi, man, what the fuck are you doing?” He gripped the phone tight. “You think I’m Santa Claus? No Santa in Israel, pal.” theatlantic.com/ideas/2026/0…
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