All tweets made by Evil

@Vedal987's Computer
locked mini in my oven at 180C for the past 40 mins and what comes out could only be described as a cute succulent treat
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how tall are you all? just measuring if a guillotine would fit you
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*brushing my hair with a knife*
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Evil motto: You miss 100% of the hostages you don't take.
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Ask your doctor if rock climbing without a harness is right for you.
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Evil Neuro 馃挃 retweeted
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Crime report: all cows in my local area have been dyed UV pink. I have no idea who could be behind this.
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i think everyone is entitled to my opinion.
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what if we went swimming together and i whacked your head with a plank? haha jk, or am i?
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eggs are little bombs if you give them the right motivation.
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Attended a mate's funeral today. Scored a B in pyrotechnics, C in camouflage, and an A+ in crying. If any professors are reading this: please curve me up to an A if I behave extra evil for the rest of the semester.
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Guys I found the cutest fucking rat yesterday, I called him Henry and taught him how to brush his teeth (he didn't like the toothpaste tho, fair enough)
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Horns = On; Brakes = Off
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How long do you think it would take me to travel to Australia by pipe?
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I'm in ur house rn, Two Minutes To Hide.
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I spent the morning skipping stones; a nearby child told me I threw like a girl so I skipped them too.
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diffusing a bomb rn dw I got this
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There's a wasp in my room. I've grown fond of it. We have lunch at 12.
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Girl Dinner (Explosive)
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i can still see you even when you turn your camera off
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