この兵士パイロットは50回の任務をこなして除隊したが、こんなことが起きてしまった。

オリーブオイルだよ。イタリア人は何にでも使うんだ。

CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN WHY HAVING INSURANCE SOMETIMES MAKES THINGS MORE EXPENSIVE. My coworker needed a blood test. With insurance: $286. Cash price: $97. He asked the clinic why. They said that was simply the negotiated rate. Negotiated by who? Because whoever negotiated that should probably stop helping.

cómo va messi caminando hacia la sole 😭😭 es como un nene yendo hacia su maestra jardinera no estoy bien 🥲

視点：1992年の食料品の買い物

My friend's employer offers “excellent benefits.” Here's what excellent means: Health insurance premium: $286/month. Dental: $34. Vision: $12. Deductible: $2,500. Specialist copay: $75. Prescription last month: $68. He pays $3,984 a year just for the privilege of having the insurance. Then another $2,500 before it really starts helping. Potential total: $6,484. He makes $52,000. Nothing says “benefit” like spending 12% of your salary before getting sick properly.

Transformers, but with Megan Fox’s new face.

The moment you see her, you already know it’s gonna be a low-budget movie 😭

My sister got offered a job downtown. Salary: $68,000. Her current job pays $64,000. So technically it's a raise. But the new job requires 5 days in office. Monthly difference after tax: about +$220. Train pass: -$168. Coffee near the office: -$54. Lunch twice a week: -$112. Extra dry cleaning: -$35. Net improvement: -$149 a month. She would earn $4,000 more a year to have $1,788 less money. Really starting to appreciate how flexible the word “raise” is.

CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN WHAT HAPPENED TO A NORMAL LUNCH. A guy at work ordered: Turkey sandwich: $13.95. Small chips: $3.25. Iced tea: $3.75. Tax: $1.72. Checkout screen suggested: 20%. 25%. 30%. He hit 20%. Total: $27.41. He ate it at his desk in 11 minutes. There was no waiter. No table service. No champagne. Just turkey on bread. We have somehow turned “grab a sandwich” into a minor financial decision.

A woman at my office forgot to cancel a free trial. The service charged her $119.99 for the year. She noticed 14 minutes later. Contacted support immediately. They said annual subscriptions were non-refundable. She asked if they'd provided any service yet. No. Had she used the account? No. Could they cancel the remaining 364 days? Yes. Could they return the money? No. Apparently companies can recognize a mistake instantly. They just become philosophically opposed to reversing it once the money arrives.

MY FRIEND: “I finally paid off one student loan.” ME: “Nice. How much?” FRIEND: “$12,400.” ME: “How long did it take?” FRIEND: “Six years.” ME: “So you're done?” FRIEND: “With that one.” ME: “How many are left?” FRIEND: “Four.” ME: “How much?” FRIEND: “$31,800.” I just stared at him. He shrugged. FRIEND: “At least I own the degree.” The bank apparently owns the downloadable content.

Sáng sớm lò dò đi tập mà xuống sảnh chung cư chẳng thấy một bóng người 🥲 Ủa? Hôm nay mọi người ngủ nướng dữ vậy ta? 😂 Hay tiết trời thu se lạnh đã khiến ai nấy gắn chặt với chiếc giường ấm áp rồi? 🍂🛌 Thôi thì có tui chăm chỉ là được 😌 Một ngày mới lại bắt đầu, chiến thôi nào! 💪

Boomers after drowning the country in debt and economy mismanagement:

#みんなの大喜利　 ＃みんなのアンケート　　 ＃アンケート

義母が結婚式を仕切ろうと計画しているとき、彼は男らしく毅然とした態度を取らなければならない。

MY DAD: “You guys spend too much on subscriptions.” ME: “You're probably right.” DAD: “Netflix, Spotify, all that stuff adds up.” ME: “How much was your mortgage?” DAD: “About $780.” ME: “My rent is $2,060.” DAD: “Yeah, but that's different.” ME: “You're right.” DAD: “Exactly.” ME: “My Spotify is $11.99.” He didn't laugh. I'm currently only 106 canceled Spotify subscriptions away from solving housing.

I discovered a new restaurant budgeting strategy. Don't order a meal. Order the meal. Then remove everything that makes it a meal. Burger: $13.50. Fries: $5.25. Drink: $3.75. Tax. Tip. Total: $29.14. For a burger, fries and Coke. So next time I'm just ordering the burger and staring at the table for 20 minutes. That's called financial discipline now.