Jack of all trades, master at none
- Tweets 8,444
- Following 685
- Followers 685
- Likes 25,274
I’ll hear an old Lil Wayne song I haven’t heard in years and those lyrics will just come to my brain like an MK Ultra agent
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Me to the kitchen floor after my fiancé mops it
Respect the Badge
Ps best stadium in the world right now!
@realmadriden
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$5 Bass Pro Trucker Hat retweeted
Oh good they're sending a bunch of guys up a staircase to get Bourne. Looks like this is the end for old Bourney
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Streaming services be like “yo sorry but we’re upping the price for you to watch this show”
And I’m always like “damn that sucks but okay”
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I’d love to be a side actor in a pharmaceutical commercial. Smile! Look normal! Everyone’s gonna be great! Don’t worry about it. Collect
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Signed out of all 47 devices connected to my Peacock account this week and I know some random person, who has used it for years, is mad as hell
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Best feeling in the world is playing a 9 minute song on TouchTunes because you know everyone in the bar needs to hear it
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$5 Bass Pro Trucker Hat retweeted
white people be like let’s go get drunk at a brewery with all of our small children and let them run around everywhere
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“Shake It” by Metro Station playing at the brunch spot and everyone between the age of 28-36 is subtly bobbing their heads
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Thinking about the absolute chokehold Axe’s “double pits to chesty” commercial had on us in middle school. Genius marketing
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