We are all temporary witnesses of each other’s becoming. Sometimes I forget what a brief, holy job that is.

I shall miss myself.

You can’t think your way to awakening. At some point, the mind has to bow. To transcend your mind, you have to betray the voice that always thinks it’s right.

Insightfulness is my favorite expression of consciousness. I don’t think there is a more intelligent expression of consciousness than the unlettered generation of ideas. Insight is what happens when language sort of fails, and something deeper still finds a way to express itself.

Some might say this thing that is eating me up and has in fact eaten me up “is just in my head,” as if that makes it less real. Maybe they’re right. But what’s more real than the place where reality is processed?

We speak of “light at the end of the tunnel,” forgetting that the tunnel wasn’t darkness. It was you, moving through it.

I want to stand as close to the edge of my mind as I can, without falling over. From the center, everything is framed. At the edge, you see with fewer illusions. You see the assumptions that make up reality. At the edge, thoughts are more honest; the soul is harder to lie to.

Try being strong for yourself, no matter the odds. It’s the hardest thing. But your younger self would be proud. And confused. And maybe a little concerned? But proud, I guess.

Eventually, you stop trying to be interesting. You give it up. You just try to be honest. And strangely, that’s when you become both.

You don’t notice how loud the world is until you try to hear yourself think.

The world wants you to turn on yourself, and pretend it’s for your own good. Your creativity isn’t neutral. It’s a threat to small minds and to systems built upon fear and control. The world knows you’re dangerous when you can make something silly, beautiful.

There’s a kind of peace that comes from no longer needing to be understood by everyone. But there’s also a kind of loneliness. And it’s hard to tell them apart sometimes.

No matter how heartbreaking people can be, I still find myself often extending graces and giving chances. Even on the days I say I’m done, I still check the sky. Hope is a habit I haven’t figured out how to break.

Half of growing up is just learning how to disappoint people gracefully.

I think growing up is just realizing how many things you once judged without having the full context. Now you have the context. And it’s worse. But at least you’re more compassionate about it.

People talk about “finding themselves” like it’s a moment. But it’s mostly just noticing when you don’t abandon yourself. This time, go right instead of left.

new essay. read it. it was written expressly for you. your support will be immensely, immensely appreciated. thanks for making my dream as a writer come true.

A month after I first met my wife, she flew from Paris to Valencia to visit me. I wasn’t at the airport to pick her up. I’d asked if that was okay and she said yes. I didn’t know it was actually a big deal to her. 2 months later I took the train from Amsterdam to Paris to visit her there for the first time and she commuted an hour by metro just to meet and welcome me at the train station. I never needed to be told again. Two years later we got married, moved to Nancy, and she got an internship at Baker & McKenzie Luxembourg. It was cheaper to keep our French apartment and have her commute by train. She returned every evening at 8:11pm. I was at the train station to welcome her every single day. I kinda agree some men aren’t worth the asking. But men are not mind readers. Find someone humble enough to hear what you want, and respond. Then show them what love looks like and watch them learn your language. You have to ask. The right one listens. And then you stop having to.

14 July, 2023. Straight from the train station 🫶🏾😂

You fall apart, you cry, and regardless, the ceiling still needs painting. You still need to pay bills. You have to find your missing socks. Existence doesn’t pause for grief. That alone makes being human both cruel and miraculous; the world keeps turning, and somehow, so do we.

This century will be tough for Nigerians. Nigerians will find out, one day, that nobody cares whether you are "tough individual hustlers". The World doesn't play that game.