Socialism is when your mother is a crack whore and so you are raised on welfare and food stamps and were graciously awarded the same opportunities as the rich kids, which you took advantage of every socialism freebie around until you got all the way to the White House. And now you have sex with couches, a widow who killed her husband, and possibly animals, while you take the same programs that got you where you are away from other Americans.
or something like that.