Chancellor of the Exchequer 🇬🇧 | MP for Rawmarsh and Conisbrough Counting battleships isn’t for everyone! Tax is life! Hand over all your money

WEFminster
I use to be rach from accounts but it was time to evolve! Never fear the tax misery is still here ! I can’t wait to get up to so much mischief me and Andy are gonna fuck shit up !
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🚨 Breaking!!! PM Missing! Anyone seen Our Andeh? He's been missing for 3 whole days now. Not one single TikTok has been done and we are very worried! Please share
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But but I thought US Labours built the NHS you know for the working people - maybe I was wrong. I'll have to book a meeting with Our Bev so she can educate me...
Manchester Mayor Bev Craig lets celebrating Black History Month. “The Windrush generation who came and Built the Modetn NHS”
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Don't you just love it when shitcunts block you before you can correct them. No sassy they said nothing of the sort in the manifesto re: reforming the triple lock - quite the opposite in fact if you read page 79 of the 2024 Labour Manifesto.
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Our Wesley loves a good Probing!!!
Russia is constantly probing and testing us. Last week I set out to Parliament how the UK is working closely with NATO allies to keep us all safe 👇
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Anyone find it slightly interesting that the Ex MI6 chief gave a briefing yesterday on how harmful the UKs pursuit of NET Zero is? Then today our Andy Bumhum doubles down on it???
We're putting power into communities across Britain by backing them to build and control their own clean energy supply. That's good for bills, good for local economies and good for tackling the climate crisis. theguardian.com/commentisfre…
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Look how well we are doing! I know that all the British public are just itching to buy their first Mclaren car especially since they are so affordable to buy and run... Deindustrialisation via luxury products is the way to go!
Today's offering on TikTok from TikTok star Andy Burnham over on TikTok. I wish I could tell you this was fake.
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I'm shocked, I tell you, shocked! Us Labours didn't have a clue about the state of the public purse, Rachel Reeves said everything was sound and she seemed to know her job 🤷‍♀️
NEW🚨: The Chancellor team John Healey said they didn’t realise british finances were so poor
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🚨 Breaking - Flangela has thoughts!
My thoughts are with Andy and his family at this terribly difficult - and sad time.
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Its absolutely disgraceful the size of this Reform donation! Democracy is NOT for sale Please send us MONEY quick!
🚨 NEW: Labour has sent an "urgent request" to its members to donate to the party after Reform UK received £72m in 24 hours
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Is anyone missing Starmer yet? You'll all be crying for Rachel Thieves to come back when you catch sight of my budget thats for sure!
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John Stealey (Parody) retweeted
I reported the twat. Now you have to too.
This👇piece of shit is fleecing the real Niall Harbison. @_niallprivate__
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So, we finally have a definition of a RICH person. Anyone earning £38,000 and above is RICH and will be taxed to the fullest extent of my ability... I know you don't mind paying more because you have broad shoulders and are willing to help the UK recover.
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I haven't even done the budget yet, and already I'm smashing records!!! These are good numbers aren't they? Bigger the better?
The UK is now paying more to borrow for 10 years than it did during the 2008 financial crisis… The 10 year gilt hit 5.22% yesterday. Highest since June 2008. The 30 year went to 5.89%, which is the highest since March 1998. 28 years. In January that 10 year was at 4.34%. So it’s up 88 basis points in 8 months. Part of it is global. Oil is up on the Iran conflict, central banks have turned hawkish everywhere, and long-dated debt is getting repriced across every developed market at the same time. But gilts are underperforming their peers and that part is domestic. There’s a Budget on October 28 and the market is pricing in what it might contain. Markets now have a November hike at roughly 70% and a second one by February at 80%. At the start of the year everyone expected cuts… Shop price inflation just hit a 2 year high, which isn’t helping. Put this next to everything else. US 30 year at 5.29%. Japan’s 10 year above 3% for the first time since 1996. UK 10 year at 2008 levels. Every major government is discovering what its debt actually costs at the same time. If you want to know where I’m deploying capital, turn notifications on. A lot of people will regret not doing it.
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Our Dear Leader, King of the North will proceed with the following Starmer policies * Giving away Chagos * Banning social media for kids * Taxing the shit out of everything * Upping the Gilts * Assisted dying bill proceeds Meet the new boss just like the old boss
🚨BREAKING: Andy Burnham will go ahead with the handover of the Chagos Islands to Mauritius, despite Donald Trump rejecting the deal
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Wonderful, nobody minds paying a few extra quid to help our amazing transition to not so green solar and windmills. Bet you all feel safe and sound knowing we are taking care of the energy supply. Just finalising a few more tax hikes for the Oct budget and we'll be flying!
🚨 BREAKING: The energy price cap will rise by 4% from October The typical household will pay £1,723 per year - an increase of £60
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You've heard it from the Man himself - The King of the North has instructed me to raise taxes So, you all know now it wasn't me I was acting on instruction!!!
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🚨 After I deliver my budget of difficult decisions please remember one very important fact - WE ARE ALL IN THE SAME BOAT!
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You may think your house is worth £250K but my valuation office had decided it's worth 2.2 million, so pay the mansion tax, plebs!!!!
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The Emperor officially has no clothes
Margaret Qualley steps out in £2,200 Chanel 'barefoot sandals' at London premiere of her new film The Dog Stars! Would you wear these ladies? dailymail.com/tvshowbiz/arti…
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All Hail the King in the North!!!! It's only been a month and he's - Solved rape with a leaflet! Revolutionised bus travel by dropping prices to Tory levels. Cut energy bills by a whopping 87p until the next price cap rise in Oct! Defined a barm. We are not worthy
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