When I said in that now viral podcast clip that women shouldn't normatively have "unsupervised access to one another," I didn't mean that women should cancel their knitting groups.
Here's what I did (and didn't) mean:
First, the entire section was unscripted and off the cuff. Like most things I say that go viral, it's entirely unpredictable which parts will get clipped and turned into reels by libs with millions of followers. So was I being precise to the tenth decimal point? Definitely not.
So let me say: It is easy to see why it would sound ridiculous out of context to say that women can't have "unsupervised access to one another." Because as a standalone statement, it's not really what I meant.
Contextually, I was talking about the duty of a husband to protect and lead his wife. In an age of internet-driven social contagion, designer mental illnesses, and millions of women defending a woman who methodically strangled her own children (the context of the episode), this duty requires a man to know who has access to his wife.
He should be asking, "Who is influencing her? Which women are speaking into her life? What are they telling her? If she were to become more like the women she regularly beholds, would she become more godly or less?"
So when I say "unsupervised access to one another," I was talking about the frankly insane idea that it is normative for women to be unattached from male authority in general. Normatively speaking, God designed the world such that a woman is under the authority and protection of her father, then her husband.
It is only in abnormal situations—like a young woman with a foolish father or a woman who is widowed—for a woman to find herself outside of the protection and authority of a man. That is the sense in which I'm using the word "normative" above. Normative, referring to God's initial design for a thing.
So do I believe that a husband must lurk behind his wife whenever she's having lunch with a friend? Absolutely not. But should a husband know who his wife is friends with and what kind of women those friends are? Absolutely.
It's the same with social media, but the dangers are amplified a thousandfold. There are millions of voices online vying for the attention of my wife. They're all trying to shape her, disciple her, teach her, and persuade her to believe them.
As it is my duty to love, lead, and protect her as her head, this is highly relevant. I would fail in my duty if I was passive in my oversight of her. If I didn't pay attention, if I didn't ask questions. If I didn't take stock of who is being allowed to whisper in my wife's ear—even if that whispering comes through a social media algorithm.
I hope all of the above is properly basic enough that even a lot of my haters can agree. Now carry on with the memes! I am enjoying them immensely. 😂