If you’ve experienced the loss of a loved one and are going through a period of grief, I want you to know something:
It gets better.
Not necessarily because you eventually stop missing the person, the relationship, the life you had, or whatever it is you lost. But because, with time, you learn how to carry the loss.
Grief can be strange. You may think you are doing fine, and then, out of nowhere, a song, a place, a photograph, a smell or a particular moment can bring everything rushing back.
And sometimes, even years later, you can have a moment when you desperately wish you could have that person back. I lost my father over 22 years ago, and I still have moments when I wish I could speak to him especially at certain critical moments in my life.
That doesn’t mean I haven’t healed. It simply means that some people leave an imprint on us that time cannot completely erase.
So don’t be too hard on yourself if you are still grieving. Healing isn’t about forgetting. It isn’t about reaching a point where you no longer care.
Sometimes, healing is simply learning to live again while carrying the memory of what you lost.
There will be difficult days. There will be days when you feel like you are finally moving forward, and there may be days when the pain feels fresh again.
That’s okay.
Take your time. Cry when you need to. Remember what was good. Allow yourself to feel what you feel. And when you don’t have the strength to carry yourself, lean on the people around you.
Most importantly, hold on to God. He is faithful. He may not take away the pain immediately, but He can give you the strength to get through days you once thought you couldn’t survive.
Whatever you are grieving today, I hope you find the strength to keep going.
It will get better.
Not because you will forget what you lost, but because you will eventually discover that you can carry the loss and still find joy, purpose and peace again.