I went from a single alcoholic ready to give up on dating... ...to married with two kids. Here’s how:

Can someone explain to this ignorant Brit the history of why ice hockey is the one sport in the world which just let's players scrap it out during the game?

Most men today apologize for existing: • Wait for permission to lead • Say "yes" when they mean "no" • Get a squeaky voice when talking to strangers Their grandfathers walked into rooms and owned them. Here's how to reclaim your presence (7 traits all confident men show):

Greenflags we overlook because they don't shout: - Putting their phone away as soon as you start talking - Remembering something you mentioned in passing -- weeks later - Following up on the thing you mentioned you were stressed about - The way they talk about people who aren't in the room - Letting you finish your sentence - Saying "we" without thinking about it - Working out because they enjoy it - Forgiving you and then never bringing it up again - Saving you the last bite - Telling you what's wrong instead of going silent - Asking how your mom is doing - Talking about next year like you'll obviously be there The right person is consistent, not loud.

My client ignored my advice, and slept with a woman on the 2nd date. She ghosted him after. Their first date was electric. She was an opera singer. 26. Beautiful. Blonde. They couldn't stop staring at each other and ended with a passionate kiss. Second date started as the first one ended. They went to her apartment and he spent the night. When they woke up everything felt different. The conversation was stilted. And while the night before nothing could tear them apart, now nothing was drawing them together. She said "I really needed that. Give me a call," when he left. He never heard from her again. This is why I tell my clients to hold off on sex. Because there are two types of vulnerability in dating: Sexual and emotional. When you rush into sex you go all in on one, and skip the other. There's nowhere left to go physically, but emotionally you're still strangers. That gap creates a hollow feeling. For both of you. The tension that pulls you together overnight disappears. And without an emotional connection pulling you together, there's nothing left to hold onto. Which is why I tell every client: build both at the same pace. Otherwise you feel like my client did: Used.

A few weeks back my client couldn't bring himself to hug his date goodbye. He drove home in silence, with that moment etched in his mind. Last week his date was feeding him M&M's while he was driving her to the station. When he kissed her she said: "You didn't ask." His response: "I never would."

If you keep going on first dates that go nowhere, check these three things before you blame the apps: 1) Are you going on dates with women you’re genuinely attracted to -- or just women who matched with you? 2) When you ARE attracted, do you show up differently than when you’re not? 3) After a date that doesn’t work out, can you name specifically what went wrong -- or does it just feel like “no chemistry”? If you can’t answer those with clarity, the problem isn’t the women or the apps. The problem is you don’t have awareness of how you're showing up on dates. And you can’t fix what you can’t see.

In another era all these would already be married with kids. We need to stop pretending that platonic friendships are a real thing.

Most men ask boring interview questions on dates. 'What do you do for work?' 'Where are you from?' 'Any hobbies?' She answered the same questions from 5 other guys this week. These 6 questions separate you from the pack:

Had a client tell me his approach to dating was to write a detailed Hinge bio on purpose. Lots of information about himself. Hobbies, values, goals. His logic: “Give them plenty to work with. If they can’t even comment on something in my profile, the conversation was never going to go anywhere.” Smart move in theory. Terrible in practice. He was using his profile as a filter for effort. And he was filtering out women who were interested but didn't want to lead the conversation. The women who write you essays aren’t always the best match. And the ones who send short openers aren’t always lazy. Sometimes she liked your face and just wanted to see if you could hold a conversation. Don’t mistake a woman’s texting style for her level of interest.

A client described his dating life to me the other day and it was painfully familiar. He said when he meets a woman he’s NOT interested in, the date is relaxed. Easy. Fun. She has a great time. Sometimes she wants to see him again. But when he meets a woman he IS interested in? He “telegraphs it like an obvious right hook.” Gets overexcited. Leans in too hard. The women he doesn’t want can feel his confidence. Whereas the women wants feel his desperation. Same guy. Different energy. This is what I mean when I talk about emotional blockages. Your problem isn’t communication. Your problem is what happens to your communication when the stakes are upped.

Got off a call with a client last week who said something that stopped me. "If I'd fallen over and dislocated my shoulder, the physio would tell me what exercises to do and I'd do them. Clear path. But with dating, I don't even know what the roadblock is." Guy is 37. Runs a team at work. Talks to strangers for a living. Zero issues with confidence in any other area of his life. But put a woman he likes in front of him and something shuts off. He can't even see what it is. This is where many men find themselves. They aren't broken. They're blind. And no amount of willpower can fix a problem you can't identify.

Nothing tells the room more about a man than the woman standing next to him. Cars get old. Job titles change. A wife with character tells every man in that room you made the best decision of your life.

10 signs you're dating a woman who will ruin your life. Most men ignore #8 until it's too late. 1) She has a gay best friend

This is what 90% of parents in Indonesia do. Gendong them (cuddle them in a wrap) and spoonfeed them. They all have terrible fine motor skills, many develop oral aversion’s to food and stunting is a huge problem here. It’s a classic Faustian pact. You save cleaning up. But at what cost?

I've said this before: Not getting married and not having children feels like a great decision when you are 30 But you learn that it was a poor decision when you are 50.