girl writer | editor @reductress | writing in @newyorkerhumor @mcsweeneys @theonion | instagram.com/mckayg/ | @mckayleygourley.bsky.social | she/her
nyc
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obsessed with working in a coworking space. i just walked past a meeting room where 5 guys were standing around a white board that just had the word “money” written on it. like BUSINESS is happening here. these are DISRUPTERS
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why do grandmas always insist on being called something cutesy like “gigi” or “bunny” when they could instead instill fear with a name like “blade” or “night fury” or “The Reaper”
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having someone over to your apartment is so intimate. it’s like welcome! so this is all my stuff
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chase retweeted
I didn't get any work done today but I did get a fortune cookie that said I will have success in my career, so there's that
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my neighborhood is hosting a bake off and i thought i could win with my chocolate chip cookie recipe. then i saw that the person who won last year made strawberry lemonade mini entremet. what did i think they were going to say ? “the winner is chocolate chip cookies” ? idiot
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wanting to be someone’s friend is so much more embarrassing than wanting to date them. like sex and romance isn’t even in the equation at all, u just want to go to a movie with them
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just had a really good interaction with my building’s maintenance guy. i was walking into the building and he held the door for me and said “after you” and i said “thank you” and he said “no problem” and i said “have a good one” and he said “you too.” flawless, no mess ups at all
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first attempt at figuring out bike technology: “how about we do one unbelievably huge wheel and one tiny?” “love it”
way way way later: “ok what if we just did 2 equal sized normal wheels?”
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got an ll bean catalogue in the mail and i was like ugh how annoying why did they send me this and then i opened it and saw something i liked so i circled it and dog-eared the page like it’s 1987
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me when i learned that lemony snicket’s real name is daniel handler
the older i get the more i realize that some people aren’t mysterious, complicated, or difficult to understand. they’re just profoundly inconsiderate and completely convinced their behavior requires everyone else to be understanding.
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my sister’s husband was telling us all about how he’s cutting out cheese for his health and my sister and i were like “oh wow maybe we should do that too” before proceeding to order an appetizer called “simply cheese”
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if i were a guy i’d get a buzz cut with zero warning and if people asked me why i’d just say something vague like “for baseball season”
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