I don’t usually write things like this publicly, but I’m in one of the worst phases of my life right now.
And if you know me from Web3, please read this till the end.
It started with meme coins.
I slowly lost around $4,000. It hurt, but honestly, I thought I could recover it. I started participating in contests, making videos, trying to use whatever talent I had to earn some of it back.
I knew I probably wouldn’t win most of them. There were people making much better entries than me.
But I kept trying.
And I pushed myself way too hard.
There were nights where I stayed awake almost the entire night making videos, then slept for barely 3 hours. The next day, I did it again.
Then one night, something happened that completely changed everything.
I suddenly started hearing a ringing sound in my ear.
A constant “TEEEEEEE.”
I thought I’d wake up the next morning and it would be gone.
It didn’t.
It has now been 6 days.
I’ve been going from doctor to doctor, trying to understand what’s happening, and I’ve been told it’s tinnitus.
Then I made the mistake of going down the YouTube/Google rabbit hole.
And when you’re already scared, reading “it might never go away” is absolutely terrifying.
I’ve become a dad recently.
My daughter should be one of the happiest things in my life right now and she is.
But instead of enjoying this phase the way I imagined, I’ve been sitting there listening to this sound every second and worrying about whether this is my life now.
It’s difficult to explain what a constant sound in your ear does to your mind until you experience it yourself.
I’m stressed.
I’m scared.
I barely recognize myself right now.
And honestly, I’ve been thinking about leaving Web3 completely.
Not because I stopped loving it.
But because I feel like I pushed myself too far trying to recover what I lost.
I tried my best.
I tried contests.
I tried content.
I tried staying up.
I tried finding ways to make things work.
And somehow, while trying to fix one problem, I ended up dealing with something I never expected.
I don’t know what happens from here.
I’m still seeing doctors and trying to understand my condition, and I’m hoping things improve.
But I wanted to share this because there’s probably someone else out there silently going through something similar.
If you’re reading this while chasing money, trying to recover losses, grinding endlessly or sacrificing your sleep and health because you think you’ll “fix everything tomorrow”…
Please don’t make the same mistake I did.
Money can be recovered.
Your health is something you shouldn’t gamble with.
I don’t know if I’ll be around Web3 the same way after this.
Maybe I’ll come back.
Maybe I won’t.
But for now, I just want some peace.
That’s all I want....
goodbye
@Tommylee861 @silvermoontaco @OneSHOTkill_TM and other friends