writer, researcher, ultimate nfl insider. full of deep sympathy, modified by contempt. follow @slowlearnerspod same handle on b-sky.

PHL
fewer americans are paying for open casket funerals. what does this bode for the craft of necrotic beautification known as "restorative art"? for the new issue of @Harpers, i met with morticians to trace the history, and future, of their dying art. harpers.org/archive/2026/08/…
14
33
291
47,816
damn. I’m a fuckin loser!
4
74
52,681
I would step over my own mother’s grave to be served pizza pie by Vic Rattlehead. I’m not joking.
Pizza Sells... But Who's Buying Grab a slice or full pie of Vic’s Pepperoni and join Prince St. Rewards for a chance to take home a signed collab box with a Megadeth tee inside. Available through Sept. 27. LA locations only. This one’s for the fans. 🔥
2
2
26
2,059
from number one to number two, all the way down to numbers 28, 65, and good ol’ 100 herself…nothing gets people talking quite like a list.
6
49
2,276
I make this comparison in my forthcoming 9 billion word review of the movie, but Chris Hansen seeing this is like the George W Bush painting where he can’t make eye contact with his own reflection in the shower mirror.
Chris Hansen is seated for ‘PRIMETIME’ in theaters.
10
140
6,214
you can now crack an egg on my calves. should you choose!
2
14
629
television this…television that….a lot of y’all need to TELL a VISION expert to check your prescriptions. cos all these shows you like suck!
1
34
895
it produced some interesting writing, but looking back a lot of the "vulgar auteurist" criticism can feel like a parlor game where cinephiles are trying to see how much they could get away with.
all the “serious” writing on these films is like “Alice must ‘level up’ as she ‘collects coins’ and tries not to get ‘Game Over’ and put in another quarter, just like the Resident Evil video games these films are obliquely critiquing” like what the fuck are you talking about lol
15
1,685
that's done and dusted. according to "The Old Grey Lady," the number one TV show of all time is the Onion News Network's short-lived "Antiques Roadshow"-parody web series "Lake Dredge Appraisal"!
7
572
she's at the "infiltrating shadow moses island to take down FOXHOUND" stage of her downfall.
Nancy Mace is now dressing like JD Vance's favorite leather couch lol shit is getting real boss
35
2,118
JD Vance doing the Fred Willard in Waiting For Guffman: “we have Chinese restaurants in Ohio. but I heard over there the food is like steamed or something? you can’t get a sauce this thick. they don’t make it!”
The Trump-Xi State Dinner guest list, per the White House: President Donald J. Trump First Lady Melania Trump President Xi Jinping Madame Peng Liyuan Vice President JD Vance Second Lady Usha Vance Secretary of State Marco Rubio Jeanette Rubio, Spouse of the Secretary of State Chief of Staff Susie Wiles U.S. Ambassador to China David Perdue Bonnie Perdue, Spouse of the US Ambassador to China Secretary of the Treasury Scott Bessent John Freeman, Spouse of the Secretary of the Treasury Secretary of War Pete Hegseth Ambassador Jamieson Greer, United States Trade Representative Marlo Greer, Spouse of Ambassador Greer Cai Qi, CPC Political Bureau Standing Committee Member, Chief of Staff to President Xi Wang Yi, CPC Political Bureau Central Committee Member He Lifeng, CPC Political Bureau Central Committee, Vice Premier of State Council Zheng Shanjie, Chairman of the National Development and Reform Commission Wang Wentao, Minister of Commerce Ma Zhaoxu, Executive Vice Foreign Minister Ambassador Xie Feng, Chinese Ambassador to the United States Ms. Ivanka Trump Mr. Eric Trump Ms. Lara Trump Ms. Tiffany Trump Mr. Michael Boulos Mr. Viktor Knavs Ms. Arabella Kushner Jensen Huang, NVIDIA, CEO Lori Huang, Spouse of Jensen Huang Mark Zuckerberg, Meta, CEO Dr. Lisa Su, Advanced Micro Devices, CEO Daniel Lin, Spouse of Lisa Su Tim Cook, Chairman of the Board of Apple John F.W. Rogers, Goldman Sachs EVP and Secretary to the Board Lynn Martin, President of the NYSE Linda Mills, President of New York University Eric Yuan, Zoom, CEO Tang Fangyu Director, Central Policy Research Office of the CPC Central Committee Minister of Finance Mr. Lan Fo'an Mme. Wang Dan, Wife of Ambassador Xie Feng Zhou Hongxu Deputy Director, General Office of the CPC Central Committee Director, Central Security Bureau Lyu Luhua, Secretary to the President Hong Lei, Assistant Foreign Minister Director General, Protocol Department Cai Wei, Assistant Foreign Minister Director General, Department of North American and Oceanian Affairs Mao Ning, Director General, Department of Press, Communication and Public Diplomacy, Ministry of Foreign Affairs Zhang Quan, Secretary to Madame Peng Zhang Yongchao, Deputy Director General, Department of North American and Oceanian Affairs, Ministry of Foreign Affairs Kelly Ortberg, Boeing, CEO Larry Fink, Blackrock, CEO Stephen Schwarzman, Blackstone, CEO Sam Altman, OpenAI, CEO Greg Brockman, OpenAI, President & Co-Founder Anna Brockman, Wife of Greg Brockman Dr. Miriam Adelson, Las Vegas Sand, Controlling Shareholder Sergey Brin, Google/Alphabet, Co-Founder Gerelyn Gilbert-Soto, Partner of Sergey Brin Satya Nadella, Microsoft, Chairman & CEO Jim Taiclet, Lockheed Martin, Chairman, President & CEO Sundar Pichai, Google, CEO Larry Culp, GE Aerospace, CEO Sanjay Mehrotra, Micron, CEO Cristiano Amon, Qualcomm, CEO Jeff Bezos, Amazon, Chairman Lauren Sanchez-Bezos, Spouse of Jeff Bezos Jeff Yass, TikTok Jamie Dimon, JP Morgan, CEO Michael Dell, Dell, CEO Mary Barra, General Motors, CEO David Solomon, Goldman Sachs, CEO Jane Fraser, Citi, CEO Elon Musk, SpaceX & Tesla, CEO Darren Woods, ExxonMobil, CEO Chief Justice John Roberts, Chief Supreme Court Justice Jane Sullivan Roberts, Chief Supreme Court Justice Spouse Justice Amy Coney Barrett, Supreme Court Justice Jesse Barrett, Supreme Court Justice Spouse Justice Brett Kavanaugh, Supreme Court Justice Ashley Estes Kavanaugh, Spouse of Supreme Court Justice Speaker Mike Johnson, United States House of Representatives, Louisiana Kelly Johnson, Spouse of Speaker Mike Johnson Bret Baier, FOX News, American Journalist and Host Amy Baier, Spouse of Brett Baier Laura Ingraham, FOX News, American Television Presenter Representative Richard McCormick, United States House of Representatives, Georgia Jesse Waters, FOX News Host Emma Waters, Spouse of Jesse Waters David Ellison, Paramount Skydance, CEO Susan Dell, Spouse to Michael Dell Kevin Warsh, Chairman of the Federal Reserve Jane Lauder, Spouse to Kevin Warsh Secretary Howard Lutnick, Secretary of Commerce Allison Lutnick, Spouse to Secretary Lutnick Director John Ratcliffe, Director of the Central Intelligence Agency Michelle Ratcliffe, Spouse to Director Ratcliffe Special Envoy Steve Witkoff, U.S. Special Envoy to Middle East Stephen Miller, Deputy Chief of Staff for Policy and Homeland Security Advisor, Assistant to the President Katie Miller, Spouse of Stephen Miller Dan Scavino, Deputy Chief of Staff, Assistant to the President Erin Scavino, Spouse to Dan Scavino Attorney General Todd Blanche, Attorney General of the United States Kristine Blanche, Spouse to Attorney General Todd Blanche Meredith O’Rourke, The O’Rourke Group Secretary Chris Wright, Secretary of Energy Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, Secretary of Health & Human Services Secretary Linda McMahon, Secretary of Education Secretary Doug Burgum, Secretary of Interior Kathryn Burgum, Spouse to Secretary Burgum Secretary Sean Duffy, Secretary of Transportation Rachel Campos-Duffy, Spouse of Sean Duffy Director Russell Vought, Director of Office of Management & Budget Administrator Lee Zeldin, Administrator of the Environmental Protection Agency Acting Secretary Keith Sonderling, Acting Secretary of Labor Brad Gerstner, Altimeter, CEO Sangeeta Mehrota, Spouse of Sanjay Mehrotra Anthony Barra, Spouse of Mary Barra Kathy Woods, Spouse of Darren Woods Albert Bourla, Pfizer, CEO David Sacks, Co-chair, President's Council of Advisors on Science and Technology Administrator Kelly Loeffler, Small Business Administrator Jeff Sprecher, Spouse of Kelly Loeffler Katie Simpson, Fiancé to Brad Gerstner Representative Jason Smith, United States House of Representatives, Missouri Senator Steven Daines, United States Senator, Montana General Dan Caine, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Director Jay Clayton, Director of Office of the Director of National Intelligence Bernard Arnault, LVMH, CEO Alexandre Arnault, Son of Bernard Arnault Ryan McInerey, Visa, CEO Michael Miebach, Mastercard, CEO Sandra Lynn Ellison, Spouse of David Ellison Cheryl Hines, Spouse of Secretary Kennedy
6
1,645
they literally should have never let Rodgers walk. he could have retired a Packer and both parties would be less embarrassed.
What do the Packers need to fix? 💬
1
6
1,043
Jordan Love “studied” under Rodgers for HOW many seasons?!
3
547
Falcons QB room of Tua Penix and Cooper Rush
11
83
989
26,170
currently at one carry for -1 yards.
Welcome to the Kaleb Johnson breakout party tonight.
5
900
thrilled to work on a movie so desirable that outlets are talking about how to stream it out of market!
‘Neil Peart: No One’s Disciple’ Isn’t Available in the U.S., But We Found a Way to Watch #RSRecommends rollingstone.com/product-rec…
26
1,894
they take a 2.5% vig! I need to start a casino man…
Holy hell you can now bet money against your buddy on @SleeperHQ in your fantasy matchup as a friendly wager????? Sleeper is the Mamdani of fantasy apps dude this is so sick
7
1,307
he needs blood! the NFL needs to let him FEAST!
Rap: Puka Nacua (groin, hip) unlikely to play Week 3.
2
1,038
ATTN: #peptide and #GLP1 Twitter…I am looking to speak with ANYONE who has taken part in a clinical trial involving #Bioglutide AKA #NA-931. for a WIRED story. can protect your anonymity! just wanna know that you/these trials exist! please RT!
1
3
3
869
Netanyahu riding into the UN general assembly on Fetterman’s back, like Master Blaster.
2
34
1,392
no offence to Hasan but Netanyahu calling out an online twitch streamer reminds me of that Iranian general who was like “what American heroes are we going to kill? SpongeBob?!?”
Netanyahu Calls out Hasan Piker during his UN speech 😭 “Mr Mamdani…you count as friends people like Hasan Piker”
66
3,727
56,493
946,228