Mrk@mrkhndy
Joined March 2017
4,901 Photos and videos
If my dad was still alive he would be glad Jeffrey archer was dead, he hated him.
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I’ve just bought this, because I had one of these. Am I a cliche. Went straight to my phone. No need to get the bus to Plymouth virgin megastores. 12 more songs. It all counts
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I have bought these to stop my air fryer flying across the work top when I open and close the basket. Perhaps it’s this that is causing my men’s mental health
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I am *this* close to driving my Toyota C-HR into the window of a TK Maxx. People keep pulling my breaking point elastic band a little bit tauter every single day. When I feel like they should really just be offering me a slice of cake etc
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I’ve ordered all this. Sorry to boast but I’ve had quite a bad day again and so I reckon just having this in the house will bring good vibes. I miss having a bath. I can’t check into a premier inn every time I fancy a bath can I
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Can I
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I honestly think this might be one of the worst record sleeves I’ve ever seen. It’s almost anti-art. It’s an art vacuum. If you put this sleeve in the Tate it would suck all of the art out of the building.
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It’s gonna be a while until I’m capable of using my mouth but I’m getting the first week back in the saddle researched. Loads of places in Kendal don’t open Monday and Tuesday because they worked on Saturday and Sunday. Imagine that!
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Ironically I do have a piss fetish
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Number of men who washed their hands after using the toilet in Manchester Piccadilly toilets: one. ME! Everyone was looking at me as if I had a cleanliness fetish
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Pret have added spinach to their egg sandwich and are now calling it egg florentine and charging €9. That’s the standalone tweet to shock. (Context: might just be the airport price, and that’s quite reasonable for a deep filled fresh sandwich which looks delicious)
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I am hiding all the replies to this.
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Mrk retweeted
peanut@AmyLeMesmer
Oct 2
there are a lot of things to hate about Cristiano Ronaldo, but up there is the fact that he looks like he has a haircut every single day
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I was going to tweet “you make your choices” and attach this picture yesterday at the airport but I wasn’t really in the mood.
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I’m not really enjoying myself in the uk at the moment. Everything is kinda going wrong. But that’s not the uk’s fault. But I have had enough. I’m googling how to become a monk. How many Valium will put you in a coma. That kind of thing. Clutching at straws.
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Comments please . No jokers thanks Lord Sugar
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Did not realise we were meant to be watching films
John Charet@JohnCharet
Sep 29
What is your number one favorite film of each year of the 2000's?
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A man I am assuming was a dentist has just put an implant into my mouth and I’m in the waiting room waiting for another dentist to put a tooth in. I’m incredibly high.
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They just said you have got someone to pick you up right? And I lied and said yeah of course, but actually I’m gonna go round primark by myself and buy loads of jumpers then go back to the hotel for a wank.
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I’ll give everyone £25 if they don’t watch celebrity traitors.
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