Today, we remember a legend. On this day in history, Harambe would have celebrated another birthday. An icon that became part of internet history, American culture, and an entire generation’s timeline. Tomorrow marks 10 years since we lost him. Ten years since the moment the world stopped scrolling and collectively mourned something bigger than a meme. He became a symbol of loyalty, strength, chaos, unity, and the strange beauty of the internet bringing millions of people together for one cause: never forgetting Harambe. Everyone remembers where they were when they heard the news. And somehow, a decade later, his legacy still lives on. Gone, but never forgotten. Rest easy to a true patriot. 🕊️🇺🇸 May 27, 1999 — May 28, 2016 Forever in our hearts.

One possible effect of MeToo is that now you see plenty of perfectly normal guys who are genuinely afraid of being accused of something—harassment, coercion, intimidation, whatever it may be. I think people misunderstood what young men are actually like and overinterpreted the problem. Yes, there’s always some small percentage of genuine predators out there—people who are basically immune to laws, shame, or stigma. They’re going to be predators no matter what barriers you put in front of them. But the average guy is not like that. The average young guy, when he’s repeatedly told about toxic masculinity, that men are the problem, “the future is female,” and that he constantly needs to prove he respects women, starts to internalize something different. He thinks, I should just hang back. I shouldn’t do anything. I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable. So he ends up walking on eggshells. When I think back to high school, the average guy already needed basically every condition to be perfect just to make a move. In some ways, it’s amazing anyone ever pairs up at all. I think about my best friend in high school—I lived with him our senior year. He had a crush on this girl in our class for ages. She liked him too; we knew from her friends. It was the classic setup where everyone knew, everyone was talking, and everyone was rooting for them. His friends told her friends. Her friends told him. I told my friend. The entire social machinery was working overtime to make this happen. And still, it felt impossible. Finally, he walks up to her, and I’m standing maybe ten feet away pretending not to listen. He says, “Hey, our friends have been talking, and I guess I should tell you I like you…” He was terrified. He even said, “I can’t believe how hard this is for me.” She was encouraging him: “It’s okay. You can ask.” He says, “I want to ask you something.” She says, “It’s okay. You can ask.” And he says, “I don’t know if I can.” That’s your typical 17-year-old boy. All the nerves, all the emotional energy, all the fear of asking a girl out for the first time. Finally, after all of that, he asks: “Will you go out with me?” She says yes. This is with mutual attraction, friend approval, social permission—basically a green light from the universe. And he was still terrified. Now imagine that same boy growing up hearing over and over: don’t bother women, leave them alone, don’t approach, don’t be creepy, don’t be a toxic male. At some point, the average guy doesn’t become more respectful—he just becomes more passive.

"men who admit to behavior that legally meets the definition of rape tend to be more popular, have higher status, and have more consensual sex partners...popular, high-status, 'macho' men, not mate-deprived men, are most likely to rape." pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/4160…

EVEN IN PUBLIC

Men don’t care about your career ladies. They will date a waitress at Applebees if she treats him right. You have been psyop’d.

Rejection is simply part of life. We accept this easily in some domains. When you apply to colleges, you do so knowing that some will reject you. When you send out résumés, you understand that most employers won’t respond. That’s just how the process works. But rejection feels different in the romantic realm. If someone is turned down once or twice and doesn’t apply the same mindset they use with jobs or college applications, the experience can feel crushing. Yet the logic doesn’t change. It would be absurd for someone to apply to two jobs, hear nothing back, and conclude, “Well, I guess I’ll never work.” And yet many young men adopt exactly that reasoning in dating: one or two rejections become proof that no one likes them, that something is fundamentally wrong with them. The problem is that those early rejections can lodge themselves in the mind and shape self-image for years. But this is largely a matter of exposure and scale. Rejection loses its sting with volume. If you’re rejected 20 times, it hurts less. If you’re rejected 200 times, the individual moments blur together; you barely remember them at all. And statistically, out of 200 attempts, some number of people will say yes. Those are the interactions you’ll remember. It’s no different from the job market. You apply to 40 or 50 positions, get a handful of interviews, and eventually land one offer. That’s the job you end up with—and that’s what sticks in your memory. You don’t dwell on the dozens of employers who never replied or passed you over.

There’s so much dating talk and analysis of dating behavior here lately because everyone is lonely but in my humble opinion “if they wanted, they would” is the answer to all your questions.

One can say "Loneliness causes suffering in most humans" and be met with universal agreement, but say "never having sex or sexual intimacy causes suffering in most humans", and everyone starts screaming about how you must want to legalize rape.

I think this is probably the most important point. Young men, as a group, have been responding to the fact that they have less power and less leverage in the dating market than any cohort in history, by dropping out.

This is insane… NBC polled Gen Z (18-29) on what they consider important to have a successful life. Having Children: 🔴 Men who voted Trump - #1 🔵 Women who voted Harris - #12 (last)

we listen and we don’t judge: atla edition

There are no words you can use to make a woman attracted to you. She's already decided before you open your mouth.