smea@smealum

hax, gamedev. i live to serve. IG: instagram.com/masc4macandche…

 Seattle, WA
github.com/smealum
Joined June 2009
boyfriend reveal! so proud of my hungry guy

ALT seeing red lisa kudrow GIF by The Comeback HBO

CowPowMonly - Heirloom Vape Juice 🏳️‍⚧️@CowPowMonly
21 Jan 2025
I just want to thank all the dang’rs that donated their time and attention to help me achieve this level of Excellence in Dome. Mama always said “Do what you love, and you will never work a day in your life.” This one’s for you
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big week for me
This Post is from an account that no longer exists.
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end of an era
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Replying to @lord_z19
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Replying to @smealum @lord_z19
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Replying to @shuffle2
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Replying to @shuffle2
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i feel like i should get some form of royalties for @LastWeekTonight using the phrase "buttplug ransomware" on their show youtube.com/watch?v=WqD-ATqw…

Ransomware: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

John Oliver discusses ransomware attacks, why they’re on the rise, ...

youtube.com
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Replying to @gabe_k
truth at last
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Replying to @gabe_k
Gabe please leave me alone
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Replying to @PecrowCR @kem_n
I got plenty of ssx
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Replying to @Nuxx_exe @DecisionDeskHQ
girl youtu.be/RnxcPeemHSc
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I drink a pint of milk every day and yet a) I broke my ankle and b) it's still this broken after 6 weeks. I'm calling bullshit on that while calcium thing. come at me big milk
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hey you looking to buy some Former Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein
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it was recently pointed out to me that all links to download Aperture Science DS (my original DS version of portal) were down - so I found a copy and uploaded it to github github.com/smealum/portalDS/… here's a video for those who don't know about it youtube.com/watch?v=TlXYyjhO…

Release Aperture Science DS r1 · smealum/portalDS

The first (and only) publicly released version of the Aperture Science DS.

github.com
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Replying to @jonhoo
thanks! for what it's worth, the official and higher quality video is up now too youtube.com/watch?v=RnxcPeem…
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the official recording to my DEF CON 27 talk about hacking smart buttplugs (and BLE stacks) is finally available on YouTube youtube.com/watch?v=RnxcPeem…
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it's over
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where are you even looking at this point
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i don't like this
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🤔
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hostile_buttplug_sticker.png
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it makes me so happy that @extrafabulous decided to send me this specific comic in this month's patreon care package, I feel seen
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incredibly it looks like someone took it upon themselves to record my @defcon buttplug talk and put it up on youtube, so here it is for anyone interested! youtube.com/watch?v=CsQ2VWEf…
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Replying to @zfasel @samykamkar @slawekja
this was in the cfp submission...
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... what are the other purposes
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it's official
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flying to vegas for @defcon - be sure to come to my talk on hacking smart buttplugs (yes, really, but there's also some nordic BLE stack vulns in there) this Sunday! featuring some of the best slides I've ever made
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hey look i still have no self control
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Replying to @gabe_k
get on my fucking level
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(wind whistling)
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Replying to @gabe_k
tweeted from Medina? didn't realize you were a fucking billionaire, unsubscribe
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why you gotta photoshop
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homosexuality, one of my many interests and hobbies
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allegedly I've now been on Twitter for ten years and wow what a waste of time that's been
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...not to mention this...
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still have this hanging in my living room though
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Replying to @smealum @aionescu @bsdaemon @gabe_k
needed to clarify
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wait, someone ported half life (xash3d) to the 3DS and no one told me about it? what the fuck youtube.com/watch?v=I1xxzu0-…
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@yifanlu found your car, sweet ride
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Replying to @gabe_k
youtu.be/lOC_WmLHqVg

Vegan food is gross- Vine

Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.

youtube.com
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Replying to @gabe_k @USPSHelp
posting here to make sure no one else makes the same mistake I did
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remembering the good old days when we weren't afraid to just fucking cut Pokemon's heads clean off
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sigh
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I've never felt so fulfilled before
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NINTENDO SIXTY FOUUUUUUUUR
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I'm so pissed right now
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fuck yeah
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@fail_cluez I feel like you might be bored
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it's 2018 and i'm still being asked to work on a shitty version of minecraft i made for the original DS in 2011
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alright well thanks to last night's drunk purchase this is also happening now, this household is about to get some intense Pikachu action
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forgive me father for I have sinned
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Replying to @ianbgilbert
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oh NO
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oh no
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Replying to @gabe_k
so that's where my black and orange gamecubes went
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kill me
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Replying to @SciresM
the fuck is a master kek
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still going
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best part about the @Twitch Pokemon marathon is singing the theme song along every episode
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never leave the house without protection
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pictured: the diamond industry
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damn what a fucking deal as a millennial I'll definitely buy diamonds now
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my black hat Hyper-V exploit talk is finally on YouTube! check it out here, plenty of gory details and barely functional demos to go around youtube.com/watch?v=025r8_Tr…
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Replying to @gabe_k
you famous
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we made it werk
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it's here. only two days late, just in time for winter crop tank top season
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the video of my Hyper-V exploit talk at this year's blue hat is up! it includes some cool exploit techniques/primitives and a totally successful live demo at the end youtube.com/watch?v=8RCH0vFx…
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we made it work
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shout out to @amazon for ruining @gabe_k's Misty costume for tonight
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video of my DEF CON 26 talk about hacking the 3DS is up, for those interested youtu.be/WNUsKx2euFw

DEF CON 26 - smea - Jailbreaking the 3DS Through 7 Years of Hardening

The 3DS was one of Nintendo's first serious attempts at security, f...

youtube.com
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Replying to @gabe_k
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Replying to @gabe_k
goddammit gabe
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Replying to @gabe_k
liking your tweets is ruining my life gabe
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dude's really selling it
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that's it 369 likes shut it down
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GOTY
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Replying to @gabe_k
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just got an ad for this amazing multi game cartridge which includes classics such as "Super Mary 2000", "Bounce Mario", "Mario vs Louis", "McDonald's boy" and of course "God stole Jack"
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@QuickenLoans for the love of god will you stop? this has to be illegal
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oh fuck yeah
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