I have three separate hobbies:
1. Reading books.
2. Buying books I’ll probably read someday.
3. Wandering around bookstores and libraries just to admire all the books.
Wife: What are you doing today?
Me: Taking a nap and playing video games.
Wife: That’s your whole plan?
Me: Fine. I’ll make it simpler.
*closes eyes*
Me: Just the nap.
Dear diary, today the blanket made a sudden move. Of course, I acted accordingly. Full claws - no mercy.
The human said it was his foot. Sure human, sure it was.