I was working on my book of Islamic humour today and was disappointed that so many of them were about raping non-muslim women and throwing gays off the top of high buildings There was a clever one about a woman being stoned, though Tomorrow I'm looking at all the old gags about clitorectomies

Sep 24, 2026 · 8:32 PM UTC

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Replying to @JohnCleese
it's a hot-button issue...
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Replying to @JohnCleese
“What have the Romans done for us?!”
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Hey, in the US, MDs routinely circumcise little boys.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Always the cutting comments, eh?
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Replying to @JohnCleese
bro opened the joke book and immediately found the worst possible chapter
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Keep digging, it's a laugh a minute sir. 😏
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Replying to @JohnCleese
“Muslim values are Canadian values.”
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Isn't 'Islamic humour' a camelymoron?
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Don't forget the sheep / livestock. Their sisters, etc, oh and for some reason warm tailpipes on cars.
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Clitorectomies is a most humorous topic. I’m sure this book will write itself.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
That last one is a new word I was hoping to make it to my dying day without hearing. I imagine it uniquely qualifies a few for senior positions in the Ministry of Funny Walks, though.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
The old one's are always the best one's 🤣🤣😂
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Nice to see you've finally awakened. Welcome to the revolution, Jonno.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Got any titles yet? Laugh along with Islam? 🤪😂
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Replying to @JohnCleese
It's a real knee-slapper.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Look up the story about Mohammed and the men of al Zut. There's a lot to work with there.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Include some about double tapping Iranian school girls, raping prisoners with dogs and the Hannibal directive if you really want your Israeli audience to laugh.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Funny if it were not all true. :(
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Come on, you left out the barnyard animal affairs!
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Should be a laugh riot! (Emphasis, perhaps, on riot.)
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Replying to @JohnCleese
@JohnCleese after your dissertation do Canadian mafiosos Trudeau and Carney next!!
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Mohammed has two boxes, he gives one to Hassan and one to Abdul. Calculate the radius of the explosion.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Stoned her damned near killed her. Rectum damned near killed him. I just remember the punch lines…
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Replying to @JohnCleese
LOL 🤣

ALT I Shouldnt Be Laughing Not Funny GIF by CBS

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Replying to @JohnCleese
Don’t forget the choice moments of animal husbandry (literally) and the wonderful faith affirming chants that end with explosive punctuation.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
I have a friend who had that done to marry an egyptian. I haven't seen or heard from her since.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Or the classic one: how faithfully they honour the ban on thinking. Can’t doubt it. 🤭😂
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Don’t forget the harram list: bacon, dogs, talking women.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
What's the Arabic translation for Biggus Dickus??? Might be something there.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Any goat 🐐 dating apps for Muslim men?
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Replying to @JohnCleese
Don't forget the Kama Sutra edition for goats.
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Replying to @JohnCleese
You crazy old coot... keep going
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Replying to @JohnCleese
That should give you enough material to make several more films, and decades worth of comedy sketches. I shall wait with anticipation.
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