Today, I want to share something from my life with you… something that still hurts me whenever I remember it, a wound the war left in my heart that will not heal easily. 💔
I had a very close friend named Haitham. He was not just a friend; he was like a brother who had been by my side since childhood. We grew up together, shared days, memories, and dreams, until we reached university and studied the same major, civil engineering. We dreamed of continuing our education together, building our future with our own hands, and watching our dreams come true day after day.
Haitham was such a big part of my life that when my son was born, I chose to name him Haitham, in honor of my friend whom I loved like a brother. I never imagined that one day this name would become a memory carrying so much pain within it. 💔
Then the war came and changed everything.
Three months after the war began, I was forced to flee to southern Gaza, while Haitham remained in the north. Despite the distance, the fear, and the bombing, we continued to communicate regularly, trying to check on each other amid that hell. I had no idea that our conversations would one day become the last thing I had left of him.
Then came the day when Israeli occupation aircraft targeted him, and Haitham was killed in the north.
My friend was gone, and I never even had the chance to embrace him one last time.
Because the Israeli occupation had separated northern Gaza from southern Gaza, I could not reach him. I could not say goodbye to him or stand by his side in his final moments. Imagine losing the person closest to your heart, knowing that he is gone forever, while being unable even to reach him and hold him one last time.
I never imagined that Haitham would leave my life this way, without a goodbye, without one final meeting, and without me telling him how much he meant to me. So many words remained in my heart, and so many dreams we had planned together, but the war stole our chance to fulfill them.
Afterward, I fell into an extremely difficult psychological state. I could not accept his loss, and it was not easy for me to comprehend that the friend who grew up with me and shared my dreams would no longer be there to see what we had hoped to achieve together. His departure felt as though a part of my own life had left with him.
But despite all this pain, I finally decided to rise again and continue along the path we had once promised to complete together. I decided to begin my master's degree in Geomatics Engineering, not only for my own future, but also out of loyalty to my friend, to honor his memory, and to hold on to the promise we made to each other.
Perhaps I will never be able to share the joy of graduation with him, and I will never see him standing by my side as we once dreamed. But I want to complete this journey carrying his memory in my heart, feeling that I am fulfilling a promise whose meaning the war could never erase.
May God have mercy on my dear friend Haitham, grant him the highest place in Paradise, and reunite us there one day. May his soul rest in eternal peace. 🤲💔