I lost my wallet running errands this morning. An hour later, a kid knocked on my door & handed it back. I checked it and said, "Hey, I remember having a $100 bill in here. Now there are five $20s." He smiled, "Yeah, the last 3 times this happened, the owners said they didn't have change for a reward!"

The unhinged level of parental interference here would have driven me insane at 9, never mind 19.

RT @ianrileyx1996: The amount of people I've seen on here say "too little too late" is concerning. If we can't allow these people to learn…

I love using the phrase "vice versa". Fuck you. I'm not saying all that again in reverse. Big shoutout to etcetera too. What am I, the listing things fairy? Use your imagination.

Oasis opting for Richard Ashcroft to support them next year is a good indication for how much they'll change the setlist.

Such a perfect articulation of why I struggle to engage with much of Herzog’s work.

Just need his guitar to leave him too

If you bothered to film yourself crying then it can’t be that bad.

the 25 years later account on september 10th 2050: charlie kirk wakes up, excited to live another full day as someone who is alive 😏

I think this is funnier than the Michael Jackson impersonator and the fallen speakers

Another fantastic BFI LFF booking experience thanks to the whole team @BFI - gets smoother every year ♥️♥️♥️

ai gaslighting me after it writes the most garbage code known to man and insists it will work...

I'd have said the same thing about Jim Carrey in Ace Ventura if I also had gone to school over Zoom

Hey chat, do I need to go to the hopsital?

Cool 😎 Band

JAY-Z + GIGGS + FUGEES 💎💎💎 Tottenham Hotspur Stadium, London Friday 4th September, 2026 – 📸: @raphph – #JAYZ30 #JAYZ #beyonce #FUGEES #laurynhill

Word is that UK cinemas admissions for August will be touching 17 million, an incredible 56 per cent up on 2025 and the highest attendance for the month since 2018.

The hugging face incident is a great opportunity to tell your family something that makes them think you're crazy.

to the person trying to log into my account your code was 739 010! sorry i was asleep