Greenland, welcome to the USA!
🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
BREAKING NEWS: I am pleased to announce that the United States of America has entered into an Agreement with The Kingdom of Denmark, and Greenland, that gives the United States permanent control over security, and all other needs, in Greenland, completely addressing ALL of our many U.S. concerns. There will be NO COST to the United States! At my direction, we worked with representatives of Denmark and Greenland to guarantee that the United States will FOREVER have the complete ability to do what is necessary in Greenland in order to secure and defend the security of Greenland, and the United States of America. Additionally, from now on, no U.S. adversary can EVER have a base in Greenland, have a military presence in Greenland, or make sensitive investments in Greenland, without our express written approval. For over 100 years, Presidents have known the strategic importance of Greenland, but NONE of them were able to do anything about it. I am proud to be the President that permanently and conclusively addressed this very important situation. This is an “Infinite Life” Agreement, there is no end! We are very honored and proud of what has just taken place, and everything agreed to today will be cherished by the American People. We will immediately begin the process of developing a large Military presence in the appropriate part of Greenland, of which there are many. We will work with the people of Greenland in its development and construction. This solution is a great one for the United States of America, Denmark, Greenland, and all of our Allies. We look forward to working with the wonderful people of Denmark and Greenland toward a magnificent future with respect to this large, and highly strategic, parcel of land. We will be very protective of it! This is a dream come true for the United States of America, one that is very important, historic, and special. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP
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Made one wrong click on Facebook Marketplace and now my feed is just people selling seafood boils
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Our first son Jimothy Allen Roberts was born on July 15th 2026.
Jimothy is a family name we’ve used for generations.
My wife and I were in the hospital for days, so imagine the pain and shock when we saw this deformed animal with our beautiful baby’s name.
I figured this would have died down by now, but unfortunately it hasn’t.
This is a living nightmare.
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Fake foodies: "Have you tried the
caramel fried marmalade jizz burger in the recently gentrified neighborhood? It's so good.”
Real foodies: "Have you tried the
Chevron gas station elk burger in
the suburban racist neighborhood?
It's so good.”
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Clavicular is not just the most misunderstood genius of our time, he’s also a literal reincarnation of Oscar Wilde:
-Both believe beauty is more important than intellect.
-Both were experts at generating attention and headlines.
-Both were unfairly persecuted for being homosexual
This mural is his picture of Dorian Gray:
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This viral raccoon named Jimothy makes much more sense when you realize the name appears 221 times in the Epstein emails
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Waaaaaa we’re 37 year old adults and we love Jimothy the deformed raccoon ahahahaha!!!
#TRENDING: Hundreds packed Ballard today for Jimothy's official proclamation. 🦝🎨
A live art battle, huge crowds, and a neighborhood-wide celebration proved Seattle's favorite raccoon isn't slowing down anytime soon.
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