Reluctant, regretful cult founder Author of bestseller (now banned on Amazon thanks to Douglas Murray's bestie Debra Messing) Republican Party Animal
Beverly Hills
- Tweets 18,434
- Following 19
- Followers 7,798
- Likes 40,832
Dear @nlyonne -I just spoke to the President of Jews, and he told me your tweet convinced him. Palestine's now free!
Damnedest thing, huh? Decades of murder & terrorism by Palies, but all it took to free 'em was a tweet by an actress who was arrested for threatening to rape a dog
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And yes, @nlyonne was indeed arrested for threatening to rape a dog, though the complex mechanics of the proposed act remain buried in heavily redacted court documents. Still, for Palestinians, a champion who is a dog-raper is an ethical step up.
hollywoodreporter.com/busine…
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Using @YouTube in 2026:
You: "Ha, 'Dog Farts Itself Awake!' 5 second video. That'll be a brief diversion from the drudgery of my life."
15-second ad.
Another 15-second ad.
You, who have long tuned out: "Uh, what am I waiting for?"
Dog farts itself awake.
You: "Fuck my life"
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Current @YouTube seems purposely engineered to make its users feel stupid for waiting through 30 seconds of ads to watch a 10 second video. Well done, YouTube! Your new slogan should be, "Here's the farting dog; you're an idiot."
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Bannon embezzles the "Build the Wall" fund.
Rightists: "We STILL love him, we STILL give him money."
Milo embezzles the "white scholarship" fund.
Rightists: "We STILL love him, we STILL give him money."
Then those same rightists ask "Why are there so many grifters on the right?"
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Wait...he's YOUNGER than I am? Holy shit! Considering that we share a drinking problem, my Jewish genes are holding up a lot better than his Hitler DNA.
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As a Jew, I'm heartened that only 16,773 people in Florida House District 6 want to exterminate me.
My next vacation? Florida House District 6, where only 19% of the residents want me dead.
I LIKE those odds!
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Since I can't get my banned book back on Amazon, I'm wondering if Jason Arday's next of kin will let me use his book as my own. "Pay it forward" plagiarism. Surely Arday would be pleased to know that his collection of lies will live on as the fake bio of a tiny 57-year-old Jew.
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Jason Arday, the disgraced Cambridge professor who was accused of serial plagiarism, offed himself today.
It was said that Arday never had an original thought in his life and could only copy better scholars, a claim he disputed.
Authorities say he died by drinking hemlock.
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The Phantasm sequels were, shall we say, "diminishing returns." But the first one is simply put the greatest indie horror film ever (all respect to NOTLD). Saw it as a kid in '79. Reggie was my favorite character.
RIP to Mr. Bannister, a true legend.
youtube.com/watch?v=i3ieQxm_…
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My take on the $20 burrito fracas: Millennials started the "artisanal food" craze; sandwiches, wraps, avocado toast, shit you can make at home for pennies, now sold with a huge pretentious price tag.
We Gen Xers got $1 burgers from minimarts & we LIKED it!
youtube.com/watch?v=7Qy_Zrca…
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This mania among Dems of attacking @AIPAC and American Jews for "only caring about a foreign government" ("I'm not anti-Jewish; I just think Americans should only care about AMERICA") is baffling to those of us who remember the 1980s when all Dems talked about was South Africa.
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Dukakis even pledged to send arms to the SA blacks. But now you have @jonstewart lecturing Fetterman and @davidaxelrod lecturing Van Jones, "No Dem must obsess over foreign matters! U.S. only!" Seems like a bit of a double-standard when blacks are involved vs. when Jews are.
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For what it's worth, I've been to almost every state, and Michigan was by far my least favorite. I spent a godawful month there in 2003, dodging urban blight in the cities and mosquitos & gnats in the country. Only thing I liked was Meijer.
Bottom line - the Jihadis can have it.
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This week's Substack:
- Jim Goad
- Bionic sandwiches
- Cruel vegans and the children who hate them
- Dying drunk and alone in a hotel room: pros and cons
- Moon landing deniers get a pass to hate whitey
bestservedcole.substack.com/…
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Goad HATED doing The Week That Perished. He'd bitch to me about how it was a point of dread in his week. When I took over, I loved it, way more than my regular column. Jim could be like that; he'd faced true adversity in life, yet sometimes he'd purposely mine it from the joyful.
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