Banned from Duluth, Minnesota for having an overactive imagination
- Tweets 3,814
- Following 699
- Followers 1,263
- Likes 69,442
jeffrey retweeted
me:
instagram ad: we’re looking for 100 cripplingly depressed losers in your area
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jeffrey retweeted
is the long john silver's rewards app down for anyone else
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jeffrey retweeted
They don’t want you to know this but you can literally eat chips and salsa whenever you Want to
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jeffrey retweeted
His eyes were a striking blue, like blue Gatorade, and his cheeks were flushed, like red Gatorade. His demeanor was mysterious, yet refreshing, like yellow Gatorade. And his shirt was the hue of orange Gatorade
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Submitted a maintenance ticket at my apartment because I’m bored and want someone to hang out with
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Just watched a 2 hour documentary about inflation and the only thing I learned is that I do not understand basic economics
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jeffrey retweeted
Sometimes a white person will tweet something a little too white and I'll mentally put them in my white people jail
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jeffrey retweeted
I've never panicked at the disco but I did shit my pants at KFC one time
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RT @yeeeerika: i have the heart of an artist and the screen time of an ipad baby
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Hey bro! Sick six pack. Unfortunately I have spent years beermaxxing and am totally gutmogging you right now
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RT @proletarat: People are really like oh so I have the most disgusting cough in the world and you can hear the phlegm? Time to get on a pl…
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jeffrey retweeted
killing your old master in the place where he trained you as a boy must feel good as fuuuckk
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Unfortunately I’m drunk, and the bartender will not cut me off. So life is good or something. Who cares
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If god is real and everything is predestined then why did he make me piss the bed until I was 24
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jeffrey retweeted
a condom? are you serious? single use plastic? so you hate the planet got it
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