Spiders fuckups in politics weekly roundup. The coronation, not the country - Burnham spent conference week selling first-time-buyer help, a high-street slush fund and the pious line that an early election would be “backward-looking.” Translation: we just swapped the man in the chair, we will not ask you if you wanted this government, and we will spray small cheques at shopfronts while rents, bills and the growth numbers stay ugly. Seventh prime minister in a decade and they still treat a party conference like a baptism. Peter Kyle saying he is not doing enough on growth is the only sentence that didn’t come shrink-wrapped. Move the goalposts, keep the labour - Rayner is attacking the plan to stretch the wait for permanent residency and calling it changing the goalposts. She is not wrong. This is the oldest state con in the book: bring people in to prop up care and cheap work, then rewrite the deal once they are already in the system. Conference is the perfect week to have the moral argument in public and still pass the cruelty later. The workers become a talking point. The shortage stays. The inquiry as a substitute for a spine - Tory ex-ministers are being dragged through questions about migrant-centre chaos. Fine. Print it. Just do not pretend an inquiry is justice. The last government built the mess. This one inherited the architecture and is busy writing the next chapter while small boats keep arriving and the country gets another round of “look tough, look kind, look busy.” Nobody who signed off the warehouses is living in one. Paperwork is what Westminster uses instead of shame. Principles appear when the cheque clears for someone else - Crypto-adjacent fortunes land on Reform and suddenly ministers discover a burning interest in limiting party spending. Spare us. The established parties did not wake up moral. They woke up outgunned. Money in politics is a national emergency right up until it is your donor. Then it is “engagement with wealth creators.” Law as a weapon against the other side’s war chest is not reform. It is panic in a better suit. A fuse with a court date - They nearly put an Orange Order march back on Garvaghy Road after almost thirty years, then a judge slammed the brakes and told everyone to step back from the abyss. That is not statesmanship. That is a political class so addicted to managing hatred it will unfreeze a sectarian powder keg and hope the judiciary does the adult work. Peace processes die like this: not in one explosion, but in a permission slip and a shrug. Sovereignty until the larger man frowns - Burnham meets Trump at the UN and the Chagos deal slides back into “under review” after the criticism. Ukraine, the Middle East, islands in the Indian Ocean - all of it still gets filtered through whether the new Prime Minister can stay in the room with Washington. They will announce centres for “information defence” while the actual country cannot house its workers, grow its economy or tell the truth about why the last leader was dumped. A photo-op is not a foreign policy. It is a permission slip. Same circus. New ringmaster. The tent never moved. I hate it here. #UKPolitics #LabourConference #Burnham #GarvaghyRoad #ReformUK #SmallBoats #Budget2026

AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE. Someone has let me know that I’ve been reported to the police for ‘fraud’ because my domain name helpdanny.org isn’t directing people to an appeal for Danny Tommo and is actually sending visitors to my fundraiser for the RNLI. Apparently this also contravenes ICANN rules. I deny this very serious allegation in the strongest possible terms. First of all, there are many RNLI crew members who are called Daniel or Danny, and so by supporting the RNLI you are helping them. Also, there are many people in Britain called Daniel or Danny who sail boats, and so by supporting the RNLI you will also be helping them if they need to be rescued. This should make my position perfectly clear, and anyone wishing to suggest otherwise may receive communications from my legal team.

Bloody hell, the @Daily_Express forgets it was only just screaming about evil invaders. Tell us all, how do you think they should get here? Remember there are genuine asylum seekers, who have a reason to be making the journey. How many of these 180 poor souls where actual asylum seekers?

Editor's note. He was actually arrested for saying some truly vile, racist remarks.

Whatever you feel about Labour, Palestine, the horrific crimes, can people blame the right people? "Today, he’s having Rob arrested under the Terrorism Act for holding a piece of paper." How, @DefendOurJuries, didnAndy Burnham have him arrested? There's no need to answer, he didn't. And the act? He broke the law. That's all. Nothing odd about it other than most people argue the prosciption. But they are.

Pay attention you plastic patriots, THIS is a real hero. Not a fucking youtuber stabbing boats, not a #noncebonnet thinking they are some kind of, what, private army? This is a man showing real balls to stand up for a real cause. No violence, no smashed Greggs. Fair play to the bastard.

Nicely written @AxoAndy - if only people would actually understand and take in the message. And it is an important message, especially the part about ignoring is being complicit.

He's not wrong. @TRobinsonNewEra never mentions white nonces, and has been close friends with several. Odd for a "hero of rape victims." Its almost like its some huge bullshit grift for fame and fortune that the vertically challenged prick doesnt ever care about.

I’m calling bullshit. Again. On schedule. Like a cheap alarm clock made of shit and press releases. This parasite’s “in danger” the second the spotlight starts to dim. Clockwork. Same dance, same costume, same trembling lower lip. The dire wolf howls exactly when the ratings dip and the donors need a reason to keep the lights on. Fuck off, @TRobinsonNewEra. You’ve yanked that “big scary monster in the woods” lever one time too many. The forest is empty. The wolf is a stuffed prop with your fingerprints all over the zipper. The only thing hunting you is irrelevance, and you’re feeding it on purpose. That’s not danger. That’s a marketing cycle with a pulse.

Hey @TRobinsonNewEra 👋 Is it ISIS again, mate?

I see we’ve reached the knight-spearing-a-dinghy stage of the discussion.

Exactly this.

This has been touted for years - the alienation - the lack of information sharing - the fact people cannot be 'returned' - not being part of EU plans - the issue is Ireland Brexiteers can wail all they want - it is about time they owned it

1 out of 3, not bad. He actually was trying to stop the boats, just a fucking stupid and illegal way to do it. When 900K follower accounts are spreading this bullshit, what chance does the world have? @liz_churchill10 - wise the fuck up bint. You are a fucking disgrace.

I'm not. Neither is Tommy Robinson.

6 Byelections yesterday 0 Reform wins 3 contested by Reform previously 3%, 3.1%. 4.4% fall in vote share 3 Tory , 1 Lab, 1 Lib Dem, 1 Green Reform 2 - 2nd, 4 - 3rd

Manchester City just got found guilty on 114 of 115 charges and the Premier League is still pretending this is a “process” instead of a mugging with better catering. You don’t accidentally breach financial rules 114 times. That’s not an accounting error. That’s a business model with a crest on it. The richest club in the room spent years treating the rulebook like a cocktail napkin and now everyone wants to talk about “what happens next” as if the next bit isn’t already written: lawyers, delays, a fine that wouldn’t cover Pep’s weekly florist bill, and a press conference where somebody says “we respect the process” while mentally converting points deductions into merch revenue. Football didn’t get corrupted. It got professionalised. #ManCity #MCFC #115charges #PremierLeague @ManCity @premierleague

At least the ferret faced fuckwit still keeps an eye on you @donmcgowan! Should be flattered. Or scared. Probably scared.

THIS MAN IS A NATIONAL SECURITY EMERGENCY. Fucking hell, Labour, as shit as they are, have still reduced it by over 40% on last year, yet @Nigel_Farage the filthy scum is wanting you thick wankers to suck up his bullshit and believe its getting worse. Fucking jail this prick on terrorism charges. For life. Because that’s what he's become, a fucking terrorist.

What the fuck is going on? I mean it. What the actual, steaming, bowel-loosening fuck is happening? I never thought I’d turn on the feeds and watch a parade of racist bastards stabbing at boats, swinging on people whose entire job is dragging drowning bodies out of the water, rummaging through charity shops for Grandad’s old bomber jackets, slapping on those greasy little #noncebonnets and stomping the streets like they’ve been deputised by Batman’s accountant. This isn’t Gotham fucking city. This isn’t some rain-slicked comic where the psycho in the alley gets a pass because the lighting’s dramatic. This is a pack of thick, terrified, historically illiterate cunts deciding the law is optional so long as they’re the ones holding the stick. Lock the fucking lot of them up. Call it what it is: organised intimidation dressed as a protest. That’s not civic engagement. That’s terrorism with worse haircuts and a second-hand wardrobe. And if any of them want to come tell me I’m being “divisive,” they can do it after they’ve explained why their idea of patriotism involves attacking the people who save lives and wrapping themselves in the aesthetic of every collapsed empire’s last, stupidest hour. Now someone get me a cigarette and a decent drink before I start biting.