And the other, notable, thing in the NHJ essay which has gone unremarked … despite being in the largest and densest City in the US … they still had to drive their daughter to school
There wasn’t enough density of kids for an **elementary school** to be walkable. In Brooklyn!
To live in an expensive downtown AND need to use a car for school contributes to making cities crushingly expensive for families.
I’ll write something longer later … But my wife and I also chose to send our kids to an elementary school that was “lower rated” … not for the sake of doing that or any moral gain, but bc the school was close enough that our kids could walk themselves. Which was an enormous benefit for the entire family.
However, we eventually had to send them all to different schools, for reasons specific to each child.
For my son, the school was not able to keep up with him academically, despite many adjustment we made. We assigned him reading at home (1 hour everyday) and a lesson of Math (Saxon). We even put him in a class that was taught entirely in Spanish, a language that he was not quite fluent in when he started. So he not only learned Spanish, he also learned how to learn in an environment where he occasionally had to raise his hand and ask “Can you repeat that, slowly please. I didn’t understand.”
He took the entrance exam for the City magnet middle school, and was able to get in. It’s still below what he’s capable of, and we still assign work outside of school. But the main difference has been that the rest of his friends are also academically ambitious. They all read books outside of school.
For my daughter, we had to take her out because they did not have the resources to help someone who was dyslexic. My wife pushed strenuously for her to get the extra help, we paid for private assessments and help but still really wanted her to get that inside school. After months of back and forth and several sit downs with the school, they eventually were able to say that because our daughter was not “behind” they just didn’t have enough resources for her. Even though dyslexia is not, always, about being ahead of behind, merely a difference in the way they understand and read words
So the same year my son moved to the magnet school, we took out daughters out to homeschool them. And they flourished there, mostly due to the hard work of my wife … who was also working full time at the same time. We found a great co-op for her.
After 2 years, she took the entrance exams for the same school as our son, and is now in that school with him. Which has been great for her.
In my opinion, every parent should do the best for their own child, but in the context of doing the best for the FAMILY. And doing the best for your child can only be done if you are involved in their education, whether it is public, private or homeschool.
And needs can change every year, so don’t be wedded to any means. The goal is to raise productive, mature, educated children of good character.